


the devil and the deep blue sea

by AnEndlessFire



Series: Mermaids Universe [1]
Category: B.A.P
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Side Banghim, M/M, Mermaids, also fluff cause im not a monster, mermaid daehyun, mermaid himchan, there's magic involved too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-27
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-22 14:41:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13169073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnEndlessFire/pseuds/AnEndlessFire
Summary: "Man overboard!"Daehyun was used to hearing these words. Growing up in Caelona, the closest mermaid city to the shore, it was commonplace for mermaids to bring back drowning humans back on land. It was rarer, however, for his species to go on land for longer than a quick trip, as mermaids remained a myth to humans.





	the devil and the deep blue sea

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stigmafermata](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stigmafermata/gifts), [AbelsGrave](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbelsGrave/gifts).



> so i have three fics to update, people leaving comments asking me if ive abandoned my fics but here i am posting the longest os ive ever written instead
> 
> this was originally inspired by daehyun in the honeymoon mv (just to tell you how long ive had this idea) cause he looked like the cutest little mermaid
> 
> disclaimer: i used mermaid as a gender-neutral term in this work to refer to the entire species and to individuals from that species
> 
> enjoy ♥

“Man overboard!”

 

This time again, someone had been faster than him. Daehyun sighed. He used to be the fastest mermaid in Caelona, but the kids that used to follow him around when he rushed to rescue drowning humans only a few years ago were all grown up now, and they’d beat him even on his best days. This time, it was his little brother Junhong who’d been faster, bolting out of his room in a fraction of seconds.

These words were familiar in Caelona, Daehyun had heard them more often than he could remember. When he was a kid, he used to watch his parents rush no matter the time of day when someone spotted the shadow of a human descending towards the underwater city, slowly drowning and most likely already unconscious. Daehyun’s family owned one of the last houses at the border of Caelona. The city was the closest mermaid town to the shore in the entire ocean, situated right after the point where the waters suddenly got deeper and dangerous for humans. Every few weeks someone would fall into the deep sea, usually a child that had looked a little too closely at the waves, and they would slowly fall to a certain death, if it were not for the Caeloneans living right underneath.

These fallen humans usually came from Merne, a medium-sized coastal city located less than a hundred kilometers away from Caelona, but most of those who fell down were tourists who’d embarked on these boats that went from coastal city to coastal city. The humans could not see Caelona, not if they looked closely over the surface, not if they put their heads in the water. Not even if they went diving near the underwater city, protected by a strong Azunean spell, which would not only mask the town to human eyes, but would also push them away, preventing anyone that wasn’t one of their kinds to swim in. Caeloneans were kind to humans as they’d lived near them for centuries – but they were not naïve. They knew humans would study them if they were ever found out, and not in kind ways. Caeloneans had gone up to the shore more than once, using spells to grow legs in place of their colorful tails, either to study them too or for tourism, but they’d always made sure to go unnoticed.

“Why would anyone ever want to go on land?” Junhong used to ask when he was a kid. “Humans are always waging war and being mean to each other. Mermaids are peaceful.”

This wasn’t entirely true. Mermaids had not always been at peace with each other. This was the reason why underwater cities were so distant from one another. It took half a day of swimming to get to the nearest city, Azunea, the underwater capital of magic, towards which mermaids from all the around the world would swim for weeks to come get powerful spells. Azunea was a strong, powerful megacity – unlike Caelona, a small community of barely five thousand mermaids – intent on keeping its identity and looking down on those who meddled with humans. They had no ongoing quarrel with Caeloneans, not for the last two centuries, as the two cities had found it was much more profitable to trade with one another – Azuneans would offer their spells against the Caelonean hospitality for those who wished to go to Merne, as well as the coastal mermaids’ extensive knowledge about humankind. But Daehyun had more than once been the witness of their arrogance and he knew, although they would never say it out loud while in Caelona, that they didn’t always go on land with the kindest intentions.

 

Ten minutes later, Junhong swam into their house again, his hands full with an unfamiliar item.

“Did you catch them?” Daehyun said excitedly, jumping off the bed at the sight of the black bag in his brother’s hand.

He knew humans drowning were never a matter of excitement, and yet, ever since he was a child, Daehyun had always been fascinated with them. He’d only went to Merne once with his parents, before Junhong was born, and could barely remember anything about it. He was too much of a coward to go on land by himself – he’d promised to Junhong they would someday, when they could gather enough pearls to pay for two spells to get legs.

“Yes, I did, I’m not twelve anymore, Daehyun” Junhong replied, rolling his eyes. “It was a man this time, young, around your age. He dropped this though, and I only saw it after I’d brought him back on the boat. And before you ask, yes, I remembered to spill memory dust on him and the boat. No one will remember.”

Daehyun seized the black bag from his brother’s hands. The spell that protected Caelona also protected the people’s belongings from water erosion, allowing them to keep human-made goods underwater. But despite the spell, the content of the bag had already had time to soak before it had entered the protected area, and when Daehyun pulled out what looked like notebooks and study papers, some of it was damaged. Still, he was able to read what was written on them, opening a few out of curiosity.

“You said he was young, right?” he said, his brother nodding. “He must have been a student. None of these words make sense to me.”

He recognized the language and could read the words, indicating that they must have been from Merne or around, but those sentences seemed obscure. Humans and mermaids rarely studied the same subjects, as they did not have the same needs. Still, Daehyun could recognize that these were notes, accompanied by vague drawings of small animals, the sign of a very boring lecture.

“They must be devastated to have lost these,” Junhong said. “Someone should bring it back to them.”

“Don’t even think about it,” Daehyun replied dryly. “Mom and Dad would never let you. Plus, you have to go to uni tomorrow. It’s late, Jun, go to bed and forget about it.”

His brother let out an exaggerated sigh.

“You’re no fun since you graduated.”

 

Daehyun had spent some time in university, studying languages and basic Azunean and Caelonean spells, but he’d never had big ambitions. Some of his friends had left to Azunea and further, to learn more about spells and potions, or had become doctors, nurses or even sea historians. He was never that adventurous. As soon as he’d graduated, he’d began working with his parents on the family hotel, that hosted mermaids from out of town who travelled to go on land. He was a hard-worker – he’d wake up early ever day to prepare breakfast before the clients woke up, would make sure the hotel was always clean and welcomed everyone with his most charming smile, even the most stuck-up Azuneans. He knew Caelona by heart, could improvise his speeches when giving spontaneous tours of the city and could speak five mermaid languages and two human ones fluently. He was good at his job, and he couldn’t say he hated it, but it was a safe job. He hadn’t struggled to get it, he knew he could keep it his entire life, but it also required being stuck in the same house he’d grown up in until he died. Not the most thrilling life, but what could he do? He was not adventurous. He didn’t want to risk it all.

Yet, when he was making memory dust at the request of some of his clients, the damaged notebooks came back to mind. He imagined what it would have been like to lose all his notes when he was in university, weeks of work disappearing into thin air all at once. He felt bad seeing the bag hidden behind the counter, a man’s hardwork in his possession and yet he could do nothing about it.

“There you go sir,” he said with a smile once he was done, handing over a bottle filled with memory dust.

The man thanked him warmly before handing him a few more pearls than necessary. Azuneans might be slightly full of themselves, but it was easy working for them – not only did they speak the same language as Caeloneans, but they knew how to appreciate local spells and always gave Daehyun generous tips. His time in university hasn’t been a complete waste after all – he could make at least two dozen Caelonean spells and potions by heart.

Later at night, after he was done tending to all the clients, Daehyun was attempting to have a peaceful dinner, thinking of the amount of work waiting for him in the morning. The hotel was full, all nine rooms occupied by either couples or families, and aside from his parents, all the other employees were part-timers. All he wished for was to spend his downtime away from the noise, in a quiet atmosphere, where he could relax and think about something that wasn’t cleaning up after messy tourists. That was, of course, counting without Junhong.

“It’s not a big deal!” his brother said vehemently. “I’m old enough to go on land.”

“Not until you finish university, young man,” their mother retorted. “And who would pay for the trip? How long would you have to stay to be able to find this man? It’s out of the question.”

“But mom!” Jun shouted, pouting. “It’s not fair. Dae already went on land when he was a kid but you never took me.”

“Your mother is right,” their father continued. “It’s too dangerous and expensive. Once you’re older, then you can make your own decisions. It is sad that this young man lost his notes, and we’ll see if we can find someone else in the city that could try to return them, but it won’t be you. Get that idea out of your head.”

Junhong kept pouting, but he said no more.

“I could do it,” Daehyun said absent-mindedly while staring at his plate. “I have enough money for one trip.”

It was just a thought thrown into the conversation. He always said these things, pretending to his parents and himself he would ever dare to do something else than stay in his own little bubble. They would either brush off his remarks or tell him to think it over and then it was never brought up again. Yet, this time, he was met with an unusual silence, prompting him to lift his eyes off his plate. His parents were looking at each other intently, seemingly having a silent discussion together.

“What?” he said. “I was just throwing that out there, you know. If you don’t find someone else, yada yada yada.”

“Actually…” his father said pensively. “Your mother and I were talking earlier and… we don’t think it would be a bad idea for you to go on land for a bit.”

Daehyun dropped his fork so comedically that Junhong almost dropped out of his chair, his shiny blue tail twisting as he laughed.

“What?” he only managed to say.

“You’ve been living here all your life and you seemed to enjoy your job,” his mother said. “Which is a good thing of course, but I think it’s important for a young man to see more of the world before you settle definitely. You haven’t even been to Azunea in years. You might have some regrets once you get older, especially if you decide to take over the hotel. You won’t be able to do this later.”

“Listen, Daehyun,” his father continued after his mother was met with complete silence. “No one is forcing you to do this. But what’s the worst that could happen? You leave for a few months, as long as you have the return spell, you can come back whenever you feel like it. Returning this young man’s bag can be your incentive. Once you’ve found him, you come back home. In the meantime, you will have seen things you’ll never see by staying here. Think it over.”

 

He’d barely thought it over when he found himself, two days later, entering Azunea after several hours of swimming. His muscles were tired, his mind confused but, somehow, he was here, looking for the nearest place he could buy spells for a two-way trip to Merne.

“You’re Caelonean,” the Azunean shopkeeper had told him. “I’d recognize that accent anywhere.”

And then the man had handed to him two small bottles, one blue, one purple, not unlike the ones he used for his own spells.

“One _Hymn of bones_ to get legs,” he’d said, holding one bottle filled with a thick, purple liquid and branded with the same name. “And one _Dispersion of blessings_ to get your tail back. Our very own wizard worked on these yesterday. _Hymn of bones_ is a definitive spell, it will last as long as you wish it to. Don’t lose your _Dispersion of blessings_ however, or you won’t be able to get your tail back.”

And there he was. He took the two bottles and paid swiftly, leaving the shop as fast as he could. He could hardly turn back now.

He reached for the black bag he’d taken with him and carefully placed the bottles inside of it. He gave one last look at one of the human’s notebook before he closed the bag and started swimming back to Caelona. He’d looked at the man’s name a few times already, trying to mentally scar it into his mind as it was the only clue he’d found in the bag.

 _Yoo Youngjae_ , he thought. _I will find you._

 

Mermaids who had turned away from the sea and decided to live on land were rare, but they existed. It was a tough choice to do, as it was difficult to go back and forth from Caelona and Merne unless you had a hefty reserve of spells in advance. It usually meant leaving their home for good and starting a new life where mermaid tails, swimming and magic were nothing but a well-kept secret.

There was only one Caelonean that Daehyun had ever known to make that choice. He’d been sixteen years old when Himchan had left for Merne. He remembered when the man worked part-time at the hotel, helping his parents clean the rooms after school. They were almost friends at some point, Himchan sneaking food for Daehyun when he was on duty in the kitchen. But then he’d decided to go explore the world when he was nineteen.

At first, he was meant to only stay a few months. When he’d come back, almost a year after he’d left, he looked the same, but it was obvious something had changed in him. He’d dropped a bomb on his parents, announcing he would move to Merne for good and he never looked back. It had been seven years since then. Daehyun knew his parents visited him from time to time, but Himchan had never been seen in Caelona again.

When Daehyun had walked into the hotel after a long swim back to the city, he found his parents seated with Himchan’s around the large dinner table usually reserved for clients. They all greeted Daehyun warmly, the boy instantly turning into their new center of attention.

Himchan’s parents explained that the man had since then opened his own bar in Merne, which also had a few rooms available for visitors. It was located near Merne’s university, which made his chances of finding Yoo Youngjae more likely.

“Don’t worry about it too much, he will remember you,” Himchan’s mother told him, and Daehyun didn’t miss the fond look in her eyes when she talked about her son. “He still speaks highly of the time he spent working for your family every time I see him. He will be happy to see you.”

Daehyun wasn’t too convinced of this. He’d been seventeen when Himchan had left for good, nothing but the kid of his former employers, and so many things had changed since then. Still, the man was the only person he knew of up there, and he could help him settle on land and get used to humans and their strange ways.

 

He gave himself two more days to pack before leaving. Saying goodbye to Junhong was emotional, the two brothers had hardly ever been separated before, but the young boy was as excited as Daehyun was nervous. He was grateful too for the way his parents didn’t make a fuss, telling him to come back whenever he wanted, even if he could see the glint in his mother’s eyes when he waved her goodbye.

The ritual to cross over to the human world was simple: wait until midnight, when humans were less likely to be near the coastline, get as close as possible to the beach, where the waters weren’t so deep and the end of his tail touched the sand. Then, and only then, would he drink _Hymn of bones_ until the bottle was empty. It only took a few minutes for his tail to turn into legs, and it was painless. Walking would come naturally, they’d assured him, as the spell would do most of the work for him. “It might seem odd at first,” his mother had told him, “but if you did it when you were a child, you can do it now too.”

After a few minutes of sitting in the water, his two new legs spread out in front of him, he finally found the courage to stand up. His lungs were suddenly filled up with air, an unusual sensation that felt entirely new as he hadn’t gone up to the surface in years. Under the spell, he would keep his ability to breathe underwater and could still swim faster than humans, but his new pair of lungs would accommodate to receiving more air than water.

As he stood up, he readjusted the two bags he’d brought with him – Yoo Youngjae’s and his own – to fit his new body. His legs were long, but not as long as the now gone silver tail he’d grown up with. He reached into the bag to find a pair of pants that had belonged to his father once, carefully protected by a spell of his own to prevent it from getting wet. They were a little short at the ankles, but that was all he had at the moment.

His parents had found a few things from their last trip to Merne and he’d went through them to not arrive empty-handed. He’d mainly kept the money and the items of clothing. Himchan’s parents had handed him a notebook their son had left seven years before, when he’d last been in Caelona, filled with important things he’d learned from his first trip, such as all the different types of food, the different institutions that existed in Merne, how to use a phone and a laptop… It was overwhelming to see just how much Himchan had written in just a year, but he’d brought it anyway, hoping it could help him until he found Himchan.

It only took a few hours for him to find the bar he had been described. He’d walked aimlessly, trying to stay inside what looked like the city center as he was told, until he’d randomly bumped into it. Himchan’s parents had joined a photo they’d taken two years before in the notebook, the last time they’d visited him. _The Mermaid Inn_ , it said in fancy greenish blue letters over the door. How ironic.

The small watch he’d slipped into his bag said it was 4 am and the inn would not open until much later. 10 am, he read on the window. It also said the inn had seven rooms and the bar had a free wi-fi connection – he remembered seeing the word in the notebook but could not place it – and a student discount. From afar, he could decipher what looked like a university campus at the end of the street, although it was too far and too dark to clearly tell. Daehyun briefly considered sleeping right there in front of the inn until it opened, but he was afraid people would see him before then and he’d get kicked out somewhere else. He spotted a narrow alley on the left of the bar that led to the back of the building, where the massive trash containers were let out. He decided to sleep there for a bit, hoping it would make the time fly quicker.  

 

“Excuse-me sir, you can’t sleep here, you’ll get frostbites and, and, and, it’s just too cold and…”

Daehyun was being vigorously shaken up awake. Whoever was waking him up this unkindly – it didn’t sound like Junhong – was exaggerating, he wasn’t even that cold, he would have been fine if they hadn’t rudely interrupted his sleep. He moved to stretch before opening his eyes, but stopped in his tracks when he felt an unfamiliar sensation in the lower part of his body. His tail. Was split in half.

He opened his eyes in panic, his vision still unfocused, when his hands only found black clothing and tan skin where there should be silver scales. He was startled by the rapidity of his movement, by the way his arms weren’t carrying themselves, usually gracefully and effortlessly floating in the water, until he realized there was no water around him. And that was when it hit him.

“Oh,” he said softly, remembering the events of the previous night.

He really was there, in Merne, with legs that had carried him behind this inn. And there was a man in front of him who’d stopped shaking him the moment he’d moved, who stared at him with eyes as wide as the moon.

“Jung Daehyun,” the man said as if he could not believe what he was seeing, his eyes flickering between his face and the newly grown legs. “What the hell.”

His voice hadn’t changed at all, bringing memories of days spent washing dishes together as Daehyun’s parents tended to the clients in the restaurant. Himchan looked nothing like the young man he’d met almost ten years before, and yet those sharp features were unmistakable.

Daehyun had never seen him with legs before. The man he’d known had a long tail made of various shades of pink and purple, just like his parents, but here he was, effortlessly crouching on two human legs in a way that Daehyun wasn’t sure he could manage just yet. He realized then that it must have been even more startling to see him with his new legs. The older man looked at him as if he had seen a ghost, and rightfully so, as Daehyun remembered that he was not expected.

“Himchan,” he managed to say, suddenly turned shy.

Where did he even begin to explain why he was here? He wasn’t even sure he knew. More so, he was afraid his reasons weren’t sufficiently important to receive the man’s help. Seven years was a long time, and for Himchan to even recognize him after so long was surprising enough.

Daehyun looked down at his feet, his eyes still tired from sleep and his mind blanking. Himchan was the one who broke the silence after a minute, visibly recovering from the shock of seeing him.

“You’ve grown up so much,” he said softly, and when Daehyun looked up he saw that he was smiling at him.

Before Daehyun could think of anything to reply, Himchan reached for the boy’s wrist, gently pulling him closer, the man’s strong arms encircling Daehyun’s body. It still felt a little awkward – they’d never hugged before, not even when they saw each other everyday at the hotel. But it was only when Himchan let him go and Daehyun looked into the man’s eyes for the second time today and spotted the unmistakable hint of nostalgia in his stare that he realized that, for Himchan, Daehyun wasn’t just Daehyun. He was a ghost come from the past, a reminder of a world he’d left behind seven years ago.

 

8:15 am. Cuddled up in a blanket Himchan had insisted he wrapped himself in, Daehyun looked around the empty bar, his hands clutching a warm, chocolatey drink he’d just been handed. The place looked cozy, a bit old school, with a strong imagery reminding of the sea. Daehyun could spot a few decorations he was sure had been brought back from Caelona. The glass jar filled with enough pearls to buy several nights in his parents’ hotel, the shiny sea shells scattered on the counter and some on the tables, most likely painted to keep their shine long after they’d been pulled out of the sea… the rest looked more or less realistic, most likely a reflection of how humans perceived mermaids. They were a myth, after all, and in the other species’ minds, they were just as magnificent and majestic as the cozy bar’s heavily decorated walls.

Himchan had said the bar was often full at night, students pouring in after their classes ended. This early in the morning however, Daehyun was alone in the vast room. He’d thought long and hard about what he would say to Himchan once the man would come back from cleaning the empty rooms upstairs. He’d opted to speak of his mission first, and of the rest later. He still felt jittery, as he didn’t exactly know what _the rest_ meant. Why had he decided to come on land? It couldn’t only be because he wanted to get those papers by to some boy he’d never met – but he couldn’t exactly pinpoint what had prompted him to give up his monotonous but safe life, spent surrounded by people he loved, for the unknown.

As he finished his drink, Himchan walked back into the room and sat down in front of him. The same soft smile he had earlier was still pinned onto his face, and despite the obvious uneasiness between the two men, it seemed sincere.

“I’m happy to see you,” Himchan said first. “It’s been such a long time since I’ve seen anyone from… back there.”

“How long?” Daehyun asked.

“It’s been two years since my family last visited,” he replied. “They tend to show up uninvited. Apart from them, I’ve never seen anyone else here, not since I’ve left. I know some Azuneans pass by the city from time to time, but mermaids rarely stay in Merne and they tend to avoid each other. I’m surprised to see you here.”

“To be honest, I’m surprised to be here too.”

Daehyun told him about the bag, the student he had to find, about how his parents had encouraged him to leave for a while and be a little more adventurous. Himchan listened patiently, letting the boy stumble over his words until his story somewhat made sense. Daehyun still couldn’t find a way to justify his choice to be here, it wasn’t like he’d had given himself the time to think it through.

“But now here you are,” Himchan said, as if he could read his mind.

“I’m not exactly sure how long I’m staying,” the boy replied, suddenly feeling shy again. “And I don’t want to bother you, I just need a little help getting used to how things are on land.”

“You’re not bothering anyone,” Himchan replied. “I told you, I’m happy to see you. I can help you find that boy you’re looking for, there’s plenty of students that come around the bar so I know quite a few. And if he’s not one of them, someone’s bound to have heard of him.”

“Thank you,” Daehyun replied sincerely. “Now all I need is to find a place to st –“

He was interrupted by the noise of the front door opening. A tall, thin man walked in, the keys to the bar clutched in his hand, a jacket swept over one arm.

“’Morning,” he said, his deep voice feeling up the empty space.

“Daehyun, this is Yongguk,” Himchan explained. “He owns this bar.”

“ _We_ own this bar,” Yongguk corrected, walking over to them in long strides.

“Yes, we own the bar together,” Himchan continued. “This is Daehyun. He’s an old friend. He’ll be staying with us for a while and helping out at the bar.”

Yongguk nodded and waved at Daehyun, before disappearing behind the counter.

“But,” Daehyun started, turning back to Himchan. “I don’t want to bother you. I can find a place to stay, all I need is for a little help at fir–“

“You will be staying here or I’ll be damned,” Himchan retorted with an authority that was unfamiliar to him. “Our rooms are rarely ever full, so it’s not like you’ll be taking some client’s place. And honestly, we need the extra hand. Aside from Yongguk and I, we only have one student working part time and the bar is full almost every night. You have experience, you know how to take care of clients. Consider that you staying here is part of your job.”

Daehyun felt his throat tighten a bit. This was more than he could have hoped for.

“I can’t force you to stay,” Himchan continued when Daehyun remained silent. “But it’ll be easier for you to find the kid from here. Merne’s university campus is right around the corner and, like I told you, most of our clients are students. You’ll be paid, of course, just like our other employee. Plus… I want you to stay. For however long you need.”

“I’m grateful,” Daehyun managed to say.

“You don’t need to be,” the other man replied, smiling. “Aside from that boy… I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

 

Daehyun spent his first day at the Mermaid Inn following Himchan like a puppy as he showed him around and explained everything he had to know before he started working. It wasn’t so different from back home, except with less spell and potion making and more names of fancy drinks he wasn’t sure he could remember.

“Don’t worry, Yongguk is the one who makes them, he is a walking encyclopedia when it comes to cocktails. If you have any doubts about what a client wants, just ask him. Jongup can help you too.”

Jongup was a student who worked there part-time. The two boys met at the end of the afternoon, as the bar was starting to fill up with clients. Apparently, Jongup was studying to become a dancer, which, with his lean muscles and his bright blue hair, seemed believable enough to Daehyun.

He was told that he would spend his first week working only during the day, so he could get the hand of things before having to deal with busy nights. Still, Himchan had asked him to stay at the bar in the evenings until then “so you can get an idea of what it’s like around here after seven.”

Every night, Daehyun sat at the end of the bar, looking at the way Jongup swiveled in between the tables, not spilling one drop of the drinks he carried back and forth. The boy wasn’t much of a talker, but that was just as good to Daehyun. He didn’t ask questions, and it made things easier for the mermaid, who had omitted to come up with a decent backstory as to where he was from. Jongup happily filled in the blanks for him when the boy couldn’t understand something a little too human and not mermaid enough. He had expected to not know some things, but he found himself at a loss for words more often than not when a client asked him a question or when he overheard some conversations. Jongup had raised an eyebrow more than once at some of his interrogations, to which Daehyun had concluded this was something he _needed_ to know, but the other boy would never not reply.

Later at night, as they were cleaning the bar, Himchan also answered some of his questions, making sure to bring him up to date to the human world as well as he could.

“Don’t thank me,” he would tell him every night. “I wish I’d had someone to help me when I first came here.”

 

On his seventh day at the bar, Daehyun felt like he was slowly starting to accommodate. He had barely been outside since he’d arrived as he was busy learning how to do his job properly and his understanding of the human world remained limited, but inside the bar at least, he was slowly starting to feel less like a stranger. There was a certain paranoia that came with keeping his entire backstory – where he came from, who he was – a secret. Every time someone spoke to him, the mermaid could not shake the feeling that they saw right through him, that every word he said would give him away. He almost felt like a fraud, a criminal in hiding. He had done nothing wrong, but still, his identity had to be preserved.

Yet, he made mistakes almost every hour. There were so many things he did not know. He’d had to politely nod at clients so many times, unaware of what to answer to their jokes as they made no sense to him – were they even jokes? He had no idea. He’d managed to make Jongup smile a few times with his endless questions, dreading the day the boy would finally ask a question in return and he’d find himself at a loss for words, but it never came. In a few short days, he’d grown quite close to the boy as Himchan was always busy running around and he felt like Jongup was the only one he could rely on at the moment. Yongguk seemed completely unapproachable. It hadn’t taken very long for Daehyun to figure out that the man wasn’t only Himchan’s business partner but his partner in life, but he also knew with a certainty that was almost intuitive that Yongguk was human. He had no idea how much he knew about their species, or if he was even aware Himchan hadn’t always been human. And although it seemed unlikely that Himchan could have gone so long living with someone without ever telling him about his past, Daehyun was afraid if he made a mistake he would accidentally give away a secret that wasn’t only his.

As his first week passed however, and days slowly started to turn into a new routine, he felt a little more comfortable. Some of the regular customers had started to greet him warmly, the same way they did for the owners and for Jongup, and he felt a little more at ease. He still made mistakes every hour, but was never found out.

The evening felt a little long this time around, but he found himself enjoying it nonetheless. It was his last day of observation before he joined Jongup as a waiter and he enjoyed spending the night at the furthest point at the counter, where it was quieter than the rest of the bar, sipping on whatever drink Yongguk would make for him when the bartender had a few minutes to breathe.

“Are you the new guy?” he heard a voice say right next to him.

He hadn’t even realized someone had sat down next to him, too busy trying to guess what was in his drink. People rarely made conversation to him at night, as they usually came with friends. He turned to find a man who looked roughly his age with brown hair and boyish features sitting on the stool next to his, happily sipping on a colorful drink. His face seemed vaguely familiar, but then most of the customers’ were. After a week, it seemed almost everyone in the bar was a regular.

“Himchan told me they’d hired someone new and I got curious,” the other boy continued without waiting for an answer. “I wanted to know who beat almost every student in town.”

Daehyun was confused. Who did he beat at what?

“This job,” the boy continued when Daehyun kept staring at him blankly. “So many students have applied here. It’s close to our university and literally everyone loves Himchan, so it would be the dream job. But until then he’d always refused to take on someone new.”

“Oh,” Daehyun spoke for the first time. “Well, Himchan and I are old friends.”

“That explains it.”

“I didn’t think so many people wanted that job… Not that there’s anything wrong with it!” he stuttered, suddenly afraid of accidentally insulting his friend who’d so kindly accepted him. “I mean… I wouldn’t know… I’ve just started…”

The brown-haired boy laughed at his confusion, a hearty sound that resonated in Daehyun’s ears.

“I’m sure you’ll do just fine,” the boy continued, a bright smile on his face, visibly amused by the mermaid’s hesitations. “I take it you’re new in Merne?”

“Yes,” Daehyun answered. “The only time I’ve ever been here before was when I was a kid, with my parents. I don’t remember much.”

“Ah,” the boy replied, playing with the half-melted ice cubes in his glass with a straw. “I’m not a native either. I used to come here every summer with my parents though, and it made me want to come back to study. I like this little town.”

“Where are you from originally?” Daehyun asked.

“From a city called Meorby, roughly three hours away from here. It’s a nice place, although I don’t miss it too much,” the boy replied. “And you, where are you from?”

Daehyun felt his cheeks heat up at the question he dreaded the most. As much as he would have liked to believe otherwise, he was not a good liar and no backstory he could come up with on the spot would ever sound convincing as it passed his lips. His best bet until then had just been to avoid answering questions altogether, which worked just fine, but only created more suspicions.

“I grew up not too far away from here” he said simply, suddenly very interested in his almost empty drink.

“So, you grew up ‘not too far from here’ but only came to Merne once?” the other boy said, curious but visibly tiptoeing around Daehyun’s hesitations.

“Yes,” the mermaid replied, growing more uncomfortable at the fact that he couldn’t give a better answer.

He hated that he had to keep his distance from everyone for as long as he lived in this world. He had no idea how Himchan had done it all these years. He could see the obvious glint of curiosity briefly go through the other boy’s warm eyes, but Daehyun said no more and the subject was immediately dropped.

“Well I hope you’ll enjoy living in Merne,” the boy spoke after a minute of silence. “It’s a nice place to live in. I have never regretted moving here.”

“How long have you been living here?”

“For a few years now. I was obsessed with the sea as a kid, but I didn’t grow up near the coast. When I found out I could study marine biology here, I didn’t hesitate for one second.”

Daehyun nodded. He found it a little funny how much effort humans spent on studying the sea and understanding their species and yet, they knew nothing of his kind.

“And you? What brought you here?” the brown-haired boy asked a few seconds later.

“I…”

“Daehyun!” he heard Himchan shout from the other side of the counter. “Can you give me hand?”

Daehyun hopped on his feet, sending an apologetic look to the other boy, even though he’d never been happier to be interrupted.

“See you around, then,” the brown-haired boy said, waving at him.

 

“You’ve never told me the name of the student you’re looking for,” Himchan said as they were walking upstairs.

The two men had spent the rest of the evening doing the inventory while Yongguk and Jongup took care of closing the bar. The other two had since left the place. It was nearing 3 am and Daehyun was exhausted, but it wasn’t so far off from the work he was used to back in Caelona. Still, he was looking forward to joining his bed and thanking the heavens he didn’t have to wake up early the next day.

Himchan and Yongguk did not live at the Mermaid Inn, they owned a small apartment right across the street, but the man made a point to accompany Daehyun every night back to his room before leaving.

“Ah,” Daehyun answered as he unlocked his room. “Wait.”

His first week had been mainly observation, but having to adapt to this new world had been so tiring that searching for the boy had soon stopped being his priority.

Once inside his bedroom, he went to fetch the bag he’d left at the foot of his bed and looked at the name once more.

“Yoo Youngjae,” he read. “Is that name familiar?”

“Ah yes,” Himchan said from the doorway he was leaning on. “He’s a regular, shouldn’t be hard to find. I’ll introduce you two as soon as I can.”

But the next few weeks of work turned out to be busier than ever and neither Daehyun nor Himchan had time to focus on searching for Youngjae during their shifts. Exams were nearing in and some students would spend the entire day either crunched over piles of papers or frantically typing on their laptops, ordering new drinks every hour or so. It was good for business, but Daehyun wondered how they’d managed to stand such a rhythm for years with only one employee, who himself was a student and wasn’t available at all times. Jongup made sure Daehyun didn’t mess up the orders as well as doing his own job and the mermaid was grateful for all the help he could get.

From time to time, he’d spot the same brown-haired boy from the first week sitting at the counter, visibly busy with his own studies too, and when their eyes crossed, he’d wave or send him a warm smile before getting back to his papers. He noticed the boy ordering an unhealthy amount of coffee the week before exams started but he could hardly blame him.

The seas got colder during winter, but mermaids were built to naturally adapt to changing temperatures. A helpful ability that they apparently didn’t keep once they changed into a human body. As December rolled around, Daehyun found himself shivering more and more throughout the day. When exams started, the number of clients decreased significantly during the day and Himchan seized the opportunity to take Daehyun shopping to get more seasonally appropriate clothing.

“We need to prepare for Christmas too,” Himchan said, picking up funny-looking bright objects that Daehyun supposed were decorations from the shelves.

He’d been given a lecture on what Christmas was so he didn’t look ignorant to the customers, but it still seemed a bit hazy for the mermaid. All he knew was that it was a holiday a lot of people cared about and they’d have to decorate the bar so that customers could feel a little festive as they walked in.

When they came back to the bar with their arms full of clothing and decorations, they found it almost empty for the first time in three weeks. It was a refreshing sight, although Daehyun knew it wouldn’t last long.

“Yongguk can manage,” Himchan said, sitting Daehyun down at one of the tables.

He made the mermaid the same warm chocolate drink he’d had on the day he arrived. It felt even better now that the weather had turned colder. It had even snowed a few days before, a wonderful sight for the mermaid, even though it had soon melted.

“Can I ask you a question?” Daehyun asked as Himchan sat down in front of him. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“Shoot,” Himchan said, sipping on his own drink.

“How did you and Yongguk meet?” the mermaid asked curiously but prudently.

Himchan thought for a few seconds before answering.

“This bar has been in Yongguk’s family for a long time,” the older mermaid said.

It had belonged to his uncle before them, he explained, and had a completely different name back then, although the imagery of the sea hadn’t been completely new. It had been nothing more than the town’s bar for decades and Yongguk had spent his entire teenage years working there. At the time, there had been no rooms upstairs, the entire floor had been where his uncle’s family lived and Yongguk had spent more time at their place than at his parents’, who lived twenty minutes away from Merne. As more tourists started to come to the coastal city, his uncle had decided to turn their apartments into hotel rooms and the bar into an inn, and had made the entire family move out to Meorby while Yongguk had been left behind. His uncle had sent new managers almost every year, but no one quite knew the ins and outs of the bar just like Yongguk. He’d been the one who’d interviewed Himchan all those years ago.

“Thanks to the time I spent working for your parents, I was able to get the job despite not being able to answer any questions about where I was from, and all that jazz humans like to ask so much,” Himchan said with a small smile. “Without that job, I would have struggled a lot more. I knew nothing of the human world.”

Eventually, as his uncle had come to visit one day, he’d announced he would officially retire and had given the bar to Yongguk.

“We were twenty-one-years old back then, and I’d been working there for almost two years,” Himchan said. “I was so impressed with the way Yongguk seemed to know exactly what he was doing despite the amount of work he had. And then he asked me if I wanted to become his co-owner.”

“It’s funny, I always felt like you were the one running things around here,” Daehyun said.

“I’m better at dealing with people, customers or employees, and he’s better at making cocktails than I am. But for the rest, it’s always been 50/50. It’s easier if you spread out the work.”

Daehyun nodded pensively, looking around the still mostly empty bar.

“Did he know then?” Daehyun asked again.

“He did. Yongguk and I started dating barely a few months after we met, and I’d managed to keep it a secret for almost a year but lying is tiring, especially when it’s to someone you love, and I just had to spill it out someday.”

“How did it go?”

“Well… It was a lot to take in, to say the least,” Himchan laughed. “He didn’t immediately think I was completely out of my mind so that was a start. I suppose he knew I was hiding something all along, although he’d have never guessed it would have been… that. It answered a lot of his questions at once though.”

“Again, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to but…” Daehyun hesitated. “Was the Yongguk the reason you stayed?”

Himchan stayed silent for a few minutes, pensively staring at his drink, and the young mermaid started to worry that he might have crossed a line. It was none of his business after all, and they’d only reconnected a month ago. But before he could take his question back, the other man spoke again.

“Partly…” Himchan said, still pensive. “Mostly. The truth is that I already kept delaying my return to Caelona in the first place. I was just amazed by all the new things I was learning and I felt like there was so much I wanted to see before going back home. I felt comfortable in this new life and I had no idea what I would find if I went back home. But I still had it in mind that I would go back to the sea someday. And then when Yongguk came into the picture, and when our relationship became more serious, it just… changed everything. I knew I had to make a choice and I couldn’t keep living half of my life here and thinking about the other half in Caelona. So I did.”

Daehyun nodded again, his hands still clutching his now empty and cold mug.

“We can’t marry here, the laws of this country won’t allow it,” Himchan spoke again. “But it’s just as well.”

“Why can’t you?” Daehyun asked naively.

“Because… humans,” Himchan laughed. “I’m still struggling to understand them, you know.”

They both got up as new customers walked in.

“I hope you get as comfortable as I did in this new life, Daehyun,” Himchan told him briefly. “Regardless of what you decide to do in the future.”

 

Two days before Christmas, the bar wasn’t quite as full as it had previously been, but there were enough customers to keep Daehyun busy. Towards the end of the evening, he spotted the same brown-haired boy he’d talked to a few weeks ago looking at him.

“How did your exams go?” Daehyun said after walking up to him. He could have used a short break.

“Not too bad considering I lost half of my notes for this term,” the boy sighed. “I think I managed to save most of my exams. Hopefully it won’t turn out too bad.”

“I hope so too,” Daehyun answered. “I’m glad I’m not a student anymore.”

“What did you study?” the other boy asked.

 _Spells, potions and languages you don’t even know exist_ , he thought, but stayed silent. The boy seemed to get the memo.

“Well, exams are a universally harrowing experience for all students on this planet anyway,” he spoke, making Daehyun crack a smile.

The mermaid excused himself as he had to go back to work, leaving the boy sat by himself at the counter.

“So did you give him back the bag?” Himchan said a few minutes later as they crossed paths behind the counter.

“What do you mean?” Daehyun asked, cleaning a few glasses.

“Yoo Youngjae,” Himchan said. “The boy you were just talking to? You seemed to already know each other so I thought…”

Daehyun looked back at the boy sitting alone at the end of the counter, blushing when he realized his eyes were already on the mermaid, and then his brain finally put 2 to 2 together.

“Oh,” he said simply before leaving half-washed glasses on the counter and sprinting upstairs.

“You,” he said, out of breath from running, as he popped back in front of the brown-haired boy unexpectedly. “You’re Yoo Youngjae.”

“I… am,” Youngjae replied, visibly confused, and Daehyun had to admit he enjoyed not being the one at a loss for words for once. “How do you know?”

“I was just told,” he said. “And this belongs to you.”

He handed over the bag, but Youngjae didn’t take it immediately. The boy’s eyes opened wide as if he’d seen a ghost, speechless for the first time since they’d met.

“Oh my god,” he finally said after a minute. “I never thought I’d see this again.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t give it to you before your exams. I had no idea it was yours,” Daehyun said, sincerely apologetic.

“It’s fine,” Youngjae said, opening the bag to find his papers not nearly as damaged as they should have been after drowning in the sea. “This will still be useful for the next term. Honestly, thank you so much. I had a minor breakdown when I lost it. How did you find it?”

“I…” Daehyun hesitated for a second, even though he’d repeated the same story in his head for weeks. “I went swimming when I first arrived here and found it. The papers didn’t seem too damaged, so I brought it back.”

“But I lost it so far away from the shore…”

“The waves probably brought it closer to the coast,” Daehyun said. “Anyway, I’m glad I could give it back to you, even if it’s a little late.”

“Don’t worry,” Youngjae said. “And thank you. You have no idea how grateful I am. Let me buy you a drink some time.”

“You don’t have to, it’s fine,” Daehyun politely refused. “It was just a matter of coincidence.”

“I must insist,” Youngjae said stubbornly.

“Youngjae, I work here. I don’t pay for the drinks.”

“Fine, let me take you out for dinner someday then,” the other boy said, not missing a beat. “I’ll pay and everything. I’m leaving to spend Christmas with my family but I’ll be back in a few days and I can take you out whenever you’re free then. You should see more of Merne than just this bar.”

Daehyun pouted but he had no other excuses up his sleeve – and he had to admit it was tempting, although he felt like Youngjae did not owe him anything.

“Can I at least get your name?” Youngjae laughed.

“Ah yes. I’m Jung Daehyun.”

 

Daehyun spent Christmas at Yongguk’s family home. The couple had insisted he didn’t spend the holiday by himself in his room. “There’s no better way for you to learn about humans,” Himchan had said.

The young mermaid felt a pinch in his heart when he saw the way Yongguk was warmly greeted by his parents, thinking of his own family. It had been just over a month since he’d left, and he had been too busy adapting to miss them, but it felt odd having no idea how they were doing. He was surprised to see Yongguk’s parents greet him just as warmly however, even though they’d never met before.

The evening was a little confusing for him, but he had tasted the best human food he’d had since he’d arrived. When he complimented Yongguk’s parents, his mother seemed surprised.

“This isn’t much to be honest, but thank you,” she replied with a smile. “I wish we had something a little better for Christmas but I’ve never been the best cook, neither is my husband.”

“My family doesn’t celebrate Christmas,” Daehyun said. “So this is a lot for me.”

He wasn’t asked a lot of questions, although he could tell some of Yongguk’s family members wanted to know more than ‘ _he’s one of Himchan’s friends_.” He realized belatedly that Yongguk must have asked them not to, as the human had probably been through the same process all these years ago when he’d first introduced his lover to them.

 

The day after Christmas, Youngjae showed up at the bar earlier than he usually did. He waited patiently as Daehyun finished serving another customer, but the mermaid could feel the other man’s gaze on him the entire time.

“You have Mondays off,” Youngjae said in place of a greeting when Daehyun finally walked up to him.

“How do you know?”

“Jongup told me,” the boy smiled, obviously very proud of himself.

“So?”

“So, we can go out for dinner next Monday.”

Daehyun fought a smile. This boy really was stubborn.

“Fine,” he fake sighed.

“Really?” Youngjae said, looking genuinely surprised. “I expected to have to do a little more convincing than that.”

“Well, you’re right,” Daehyun said, keeping an eye over the rest of the bar. “I do need to see more than this bar.”

 

Daehyun immediately regretted telling Himchan about his latest conversation with Youngjae. The older mermaid spent the next few days teasing him at every change he got. “I can’t believe you’re _already_ going on a date with a human!” he kept saying, and despite himself _,_ Daehyun could not help but blush every time he spotted the brown-haired boy at the bar. _Himchan_ _is just joking_ , he kept telling himself, but a small part of his mind made him doubt. What if it was a date, and he’d just misinterpreted?

 _No, Youngjae’s just being friendly_ , he concluded.

Still, when Monday rolled around, he felt a little jittery. Youngjae insisted that they went down to the beach first before going to dinner. Daehyun hadn’t gone back since he’d arrived, he knew it would remind him of his family too much, but Youngjae seemed so passionate that he’d just accepted.

They walked for a while, Youngjae’s enthusiasm easily contagious, the boy seemingly not bothered by the cold winter breeze that kept hitting them.

“I’ve always loved the sea,” Youngjae said at some point. “But I never learned how to swim.”

“Really?” Daehyun replied. “I could teach you when the weather gets warmer. It’s not that difficult.”

“Sure,” Youngjae said, unconvinced.

“I promise!” Daehyun laughed. “I’m a really good swimmer, you can trust me.”

Somehow mermaids kept their abilities to swim even when they changed bodies. It was instinctive, just like walking, they did not have to learn it all again.

“So, you’re a very good swimmer but you did not grow up in Merne, huh,” Youngjae replied.

“Merne isn’t the only coastal town in the world, is it?”

“Right.”

“And plenty of people learn how to swim even if they don’t live near the sea.”

That had been a complete guess, but Youngjae seemed to agree.

Later, as they were sat at what Youngjae had insisted was the best restaurant in town, Daehyun’s nerves were just starting to settle. Youngjae was easy-going, and he easily switched from one subject to another, which made Daehyun a little bit more at ease, knowing the other boy would not ask for his entire backstory. From time to time, Youngjae would still hit a wall, asking one question that Daehyun did not have an answer to, but they moved on pretty swiftly. At the end of the evening, Daehyun had to admit it might have been the most pleasant day he’d ever had on land.

Soon, spending his Mondays with Youngjae became a routine. Some days they would simply go to the beach, and Youngjae would tell him little facts he’d learned about the sea and marine life. Daehyun was always surprised to see how much he did not know about his own environment. Other days Youngjae would show him around the campus, introducing him to a few classmates, or take him to discover other restaurants.

Himchan kept teasing him, and eventually even Yongguk joined in. Daehyun kept denying and denying, as the two boys remained nothing but friendly to each other. But he was not that naïve, and as Youngjae took him to their fourth restaurant in less than two months, he realized it had indeed been a date. Why was Youngjae still bothering with him since then was a mystery.

“This boy has a lot of patience,” Himchan said when Daehyun told him about his evening later during the night.

He struggled to find sleep on this day. There were two things troubling him and keeping his mind wide awake despite the late hours. First, he could not deny that he really liked Youngjae. It shouldn’t have scared him the way it did, but he had not dated in a long time, and he had certainly not expected to date while he was on land. This all came at the wrong place and the wrong time, and a little voice at the back of his head kept telling him this was a terrible idea. Second, he realized it had been months since he’d given the bag back to Youngjae, and yet, not once had he stopped to think about why he was still here. He’d just kept on living comfortably, despite not being able to open up to anyone expect Himchan and Yongguk. He’d established a routine and it felt odd now to think of his old life back in Caelona, even though he hadn’t even spent four months in Merne.

 _It’s temporary_ , he reminded himself. _It was never the plan to stay here for long._ Yet, as he stayed up thinking, the only answer his brain gave him was that he did really like spending time with Youngjae.

 

The next Monday was terribly windy, and yet they found themselves on the beach again. Youngjae was set on showing him Merne’s wonderful seaweed that grew near the beach – Daehyun knew of them already, he’d used them in some of his potions before – and got a little too close to the water when the wind started howling again and sent a wave right over him. It was still terribly cold, winter not yet letting go, and Daehyun insisted that they should go back to the Inn.

“It’s closer that your dorm”, he said. “I can give you new clothes. You’ll get sick if you don’t change soon.”

Daehyun politely turned towards the wall as Youngjae changed into his clothes. He knew humans weren’t comfortable with nudity. A few minutes later, he felt someone pull on his sleeve and turned around to find Youngjae all dressed-up, but also dangerously close. He saw it immediately, on the other boy’s features, in his eyes, that there had been a change of atmosphere he hadn’t picked on right away but now that he was aware of it, it was _there,_ undeniable.

A few seconds later, Youngjae’s lips were on his, and they were kissing, and Daehyun was very confused but he could not say he was not enjoying it, and Youngjae’s mouth was warm despite the cold evening, and Daehyun’s hands reached up to the boy’s face and his cheeks were warm too, and god this felt good, he hadn’t expected it, but it felt good, and…

_Knock, knock, knock._

“Daehyun, I know it’s your day off, but can you help me carry a few boxes?” he heard Jongup said through the door. “It will only take a few minutes.”

 _It’s temporary_ , Daehyun told himself again later that night, but the more he repeated it, the less he believed it.

 

The mermaid started to find excuses to skip on their Monday routine. It was easy to come up with them now that his only motivation was guilt, and that he’d realized how much he’d messed up. Starting anything with Youngjae had been a terrible idea, he’d decided, and he felt extremely guilty for leading the other boy on for so long. Daehyun would not stay in Merne indefinitely, and he could not keep lying to Youngjae about who he was, not if they were to get close. There was no other alternative than to avoid the boy altogether. He did not feel strong enough to make a definite, life-changing decision the way Himchan had, and it was not fair to pretend to Youngjae that there was nothing he was hiding from him.

So, he kept giving the other boy lame, unconvincing excuses, until Youngjae stopped asking. The brown-haired boy did not stop coming to the bar, even when Daehyun did his best to avoid him, claiming he had too many customers even when it was an obvious lie. The mermaid felt terrible every time he turned down the boy, fighting the urge to stay and spill his guts. But he had to stay rational. This was the best solution, the _only_ solution. It would be better for the both of them.

 

Another month had passed, and it was Monday again. He’d spent most of the day inside his room, watching films that Jongup had given him and was about to call it a day when he heard a knock at the door.

“Himchan, did you forget anything?”

When he got no answer, he got up from his bed to open the door. His breath got caught in his throat when he saw who was standing behind the door, a feeling of uneasiness battling the warm joy that instantly settled in his stomach at the sight of the boy.

“Youngjae,” he said softly.

Youngjae looked, quite frankly, miserable, but still just as beautiful as always, and as Daehyun truly looked at him for the first time in weeks – his warm eyes, his soft cheeks, his brown hair that fell messily on his forehead – he found himself at a loss for words.

“Listen,” Youngjae said. “I’m sorry for making assumptions that evening. Clearly, we had different intentions and I’m sorry I rushed in. I should not have kissed you without making sure you were on the same page and I feel terri-“

This time it was Daehyun who closed the gap between them, pushed by an instinct he’d fought endlessly for the past month. His brain was too messy, filled to the brim with Youngjae only, and he could not think straight. Youngjae did not need to finish his sentence. Yet, they talked a lot that evening, all night almost, Daehyun forgetting he had to work the next day. They talked, but it did not give Daehyun an answer, or solved any of worries. He refused to let his mine go there, he did not want to think straight that evening, not as long as Youngjae’s hands were on him, not as they were kissing, not while he was inside Youngjae, not when the two boys fell asleep peacefully in each other’s arms.

Not until the next day, when Daehyun was sitting in front of Yongguk and Himchan, a poor attempt at a last-minute resignation letter on the table in between them - yet no one reached for it. He felt sorry, and wanted to apologize a million times to his friends for quitting without warning, but the words were stuck in his throat.

“I suppose I can’t make you change your mind?” Himchan said, smiling sadly.

Daehyun shook his head. He knew Himchan was completely aware of what he was going through, and he knew the older mermaid wanted to tell him he was making a mistake, but Himchan did not speak much more.

“Before you leave…” Himchan started, before disappearing for a minute behind the counter. He came back with a very familiar bottle in his hand.

 _Hymn of Bones_.

“Have this,” Himchan said, handing the purple bottle to Daehyun. “I should have told you before, but I have a whole stash of potions and spells hidden here. Mostly _Hymn of Bones_ and _Dispersion of Blessings_. I never found the strength to use them. So, take it, in case you ever decide to come back, even if it’s only for a day or two. There’ll always be a _Dispersion of Blessings_ for you to go back home afterwards.”

Daehyun whispered a thank you, knowing that if he spoke just a little more, tears would spill. But there should not have been any tears. He was sad to leave them, but he was making the right choice, he was convinced of that.

Yongguk hugged him tight, and Himchan tighter as they said goodbye. He asked them to please send Jongup his goodbyes and apologized for not being able to tell him in person. He wanted to leave as soon as possible, leaving this life behind for good before anything else gave him even the slightest hint of a doubt. As soon as he left the bar, he went straight to the beach, took his clothes off in broad daylight – it was still early and the beach was empty –, drank the blue liquid of _Dispersion of Blessings_ , and swam back home.

 

“What’s wrong?” Junhong said for the seventh time this day, poking his brother’s arm with the end of a fork.

Seeing his family for the first time in almost five months had been emotional. For some unknown reason, he’d dreaded to see them again, but the sense of belonging and happiness that had washed over him as soon as he’d found his parents and his little brother had quickly mended his broken heart. This was where he was supposed to be.

It did not take him long to get back into the routine at the hotel – he knew the job by heart. Still, his mind was elsewhere, and while his parents were over the moon to have their oldest son back, Junhong could see right through him.

“What’s wrong?” he asked again as they were finishing to clean the dishes in the restaurant.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Daehyun said. “Leave me alone.”

“Something’s clearly wrong, you’ve always been a terrible liar,” Junhong said. “Please tell me what’s wrong, maybe I can help.”

“You can’t,” Daehyun said, frustrated with the boy’s insistence. He just wanted to finish his work.

“Aha! So there is something wrong.”

Daehyun did not answer. He wasn’t in the mood to play games with Junhong.

“You know, there’s so many holes in your story,” Junhong spoke again after a few minutes. “It does not add up and there’s no explanation as to why you decided to leave now and not earlier. Or later.”

Daehyun had spent his first evening back home telling his family stories about his five months on land, leaving, of course, a few crucial details out for his own sake.

“Please tell me.”

“Fine,” Daehyun finally gave in. “Fine, there is something wrong, and I made a dumb mistake and now I’m trying to move on, alright?”

He fought back tears, trying to preserve what he has left of his dignity, as he recalled the entire story to his little brother who listened patiently, not intervening once. When he got to the end, he felt drained, as if his energy had just been pumped out in a few minutes and his muscles were suddenly tired. He’d expected silence, understanding from Junhong, maybe even pity but he had not expected his brother’s answer.

“Then go back.”

Daehyun turned towards his little brother, staring at him as if he’d lost his mind.

“Did you not listen?” he said, abashed.

“I did. And from what I got from your story, you were happy there and you’re unhappy now. Don’t get me wrong, I missed you so much, and I don’t want you to leave. But I don’t think you made the right choice.”

“I did,” Daehyun said. “I’m not human, this is where I belong.”

“Himchan stayed.”

“Himchan’s story isn’t my own.”

“And yet, you’re taking the exact same path he did,” Junhong said, his voice suddenly desperate. “Don’t you see? Himchan made a definite decision about a situation that was difficult, but not impossible to solve. The only difference is that he’s never regretted his, and you’re already regretting yours. You going back doesn’t mean you have to leave us behind. I do not know why Himchan has a stash of spells that could get him back home that he doesn’t use, but it’s there. If you do go back on land, you can always come back to visit us. Nothing is ever set in stone, unless you decide that it is.”

Daehyun wanted to argue back, to shout at Junhong for hours for being illogical and not understanding him, but he could no longer ignore the small breach growing in his determination. It had always been there, a blind spot in his judgement slowly gnawing at him from the inside.

“Think about it,” Junhong said, pulling his older brother into a hug, their scaled tails naturally clutching one another.

 

A week passed, and yet the breach in the unbreakable plan he’d formed in his mind only kept growing bigger and bigger, until it filled up his entire brain, and even work became hard to do. He was sitting at the dinner table with his family when it slipped through his lips before he had time to think it over. Once again.

“I’m going back,” he said.

It came out desperate, but then he was desperate, and he was pretty sure he’d interrupted his dad mid-sentence. He, however, did not want to take the words back.

“I’m sorry,” he said, a few pearly tears spilling from his tired eyes. He had not cried in front of his parents in so long. “I’m sorry but I have to. I love you all, but I cannot keep pretending I’m happier here than there.”

Every big decision he made was made on a whim, it seemed. He’d first left Caelona before giving himself time to think it through, it had only taken one fateful night for him to decide to leave Merne, and here he was, making his mind up again in a moment of emotion. But maybe that was just the way he functioned, and maybe overthinking things only made him more confused. So, he went with it without worrying too much at first, although everything was a blur and he had no plans for whatever would happen once he was back on land.

He took a few more days to spend time with his family, apologizing to his parents a million times for his indecisiveness.

“We’re just happy that you came to visit us, son,” his father told him every time. “As long as you promise to come back again to see us, whenever you feel like it, even if it is only for a day or two.”

This time, he knew what he was doing. He found himself swimming out of Caelona in the middle of night to join the shore, followed by his brother who had insisted to come with him. They stopped right underneath the water. It was nearing 3 am – he would have nowhere to go out if he shifted at midnight – and he could see the pale light of the moon shine through the surface, illuminating his brother’s face.

“I don’t know how I’m going to face him,” Daehyun said, feeling slightly panicky all of a sudden. “Never mind telling him who I am.”

“You’ll cross that bridge when you get to it,” Junhong smiled, holding his brother’s hand. “And if it doesn’t work out, then at least you’ll know for sure and you won’t have to spend the rest of your life living with ‘what ifs’.”

“You’re smart for a 12-year-old,” Daehyun teased him.

“Shut up,” Junhong pouted, dropping his brother’s hand to gently slap his arm. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too, Jun” Daehyun said, but he wasn’t sad, and he knew Junhong wasn’t either. “Take care while I’m away.”

He swam a little closer to the shore, until his head could no longer stay in the water and his tail was touching the sand, and drank the purple bottle.

 

It was surprisingly easy to fit back into his work routine after almost three weeks of absence when everyone was willing to pretend nothing had happened. He’d shown up before the opening of the bar, surprising a still sleepy Yongguk in the middle of his cleaning. He was greeted warmly by both of the owners, Himchan pulling him in a smothering hug the instant he saw him.

“Please don’t say anything like ‘I knew you would come back’ or I will leave instantly,” Daehyun joked, his voice smothered by Himchan’s chest, still trapped in the man’s arms.

“I’m not going to say anything,” Himchan laughed. “But…”

“Shut up.”

He would lie if he said he didn’t keep an eye on the customers for the days that followed, not exactly sure if he was dreading or looking forward to seeing a familiar silhouette walk in. He wasn’t as subtle as he thought, it seemed.

“Youngjae hasn’t come here in a while,” Himchan told him after a few days of witnessing the mermaid lurking around.

“I guessed,” he said simply, going back to his work.

It was fine. He needed time to sort his thoughts out anyway. Work was very busy – he had no idea why he hadn’t been replaced – and it prevented him from overthinking, but he also couldn’t find the time to think of a plan, or at least to find the right words to explain the mess he’d left just a few weeks before.

On his first Monday off, Jongup asked him if he could help him move a few things into his dorm. Apparently, his old roommate was moving out early, and he’d arranged to move with one of his friends instead who also didn’t have a roommate. Despite his tiredness, Daehyun had gladly agreed. It would do him some good to spend time with a friend.

“We’re going to pass by my new dorm first to see if my roommate can help us too,” Jongup said when they reached the campus.

Jongup unlocked the door, politely offering for Daehyun to step inside first and then… closed the door and locked it again behind him.

“Wai-“ he started saying, until he realized who was Jongup’s roommate, comfortably sitting on a vast couch in the middle of their living room, looking as startled as Daehyun probably did.

“Have fun, kids,” Jongup said behind the door, clearly amused. “Remember to protect yourselves and all that.”

Daehyun was staring at the floor, his body unwilling to move passed the doorway, but he could feel Youngjae’s eyes on him.

“This kid is smart,” Youngjae spoke first, after a minute of uncomfortable silence. “When he said he was bringing a friend over, I would have never guessed…”

Daehyun looked up. The wariness in the brown-haired boy’s eyes was unfamiliar to him. He looked at if he’d just seen a ghost.

“So, you’re Jongup’s new roommate…” Daehyun mumbled.

“Yeah,” Youngjae replied in a very measured tone. “Except he moved in a month ago.”

“Oh,” Daehyun said, starting to take in the situation. “So…”

“So, he tricked us, yes,” Youngjae said, his tone still flat. “He even asked for my keys earlier because he said he lost his. This kid is smart.”

“So, we’re locked in.”

“Yup.”

Youngjae seemed to have recovered from the initial shock, his features as emotionless as his voice as he stared at Daehyun, who was still standing in the doorway. He’d daydreamed, anticipated, worried about the day they would face again but now that he was there, he was speechless. Barely a month had passed, and yet he felt like it had been an eternity since they’d been in the same room together.

“Why are you here, Daehyun?” Youngjae continued, his voice dangerously even.

“Well, Jong-“

“No, pass me the details on how Jongup tricked you to come here, I get it,” the other boy interrupted. “Why are you here? In Merne?”

It came out with more pain than anger the second time around, a breach in the emotionless façade he’d tried to put on.

“A month ago, I was told you’d left unexpectedly and that there was no way to reach you. And now you just reappear out of nowhere, in my dorm out of all places.”

“I-“ he tried to say but the other boy wasn’t done.

“A month ago, I was _in your bed_ , the last time we saw each other. And then you were gone. Vanished.”

Youngjae had stood up, his initial composure completely thrown out of the window.

“Youngjae, you have every right to be mad, I’m-“ Daehyun started, only to be interrupted again.

“I’m not mad, you fucking idiot, I’m worried!” Youngjae shouted at him, tears dangerously threatening to spill from his warm eyes. “I’ve been worried this whole time! It’s always been push and pull with you, from the first day we met. You’ve been walking around as if you’re keeping the heaviest secret this whole time, and then you disappear…”

“I am,” Daehyun managed to place. “I have been keeping something from you.”

“I know. I figured.” Youngjae added, a little more composed. “You can’t tell anyone where you’re from. Someday you’re fully in and I feel like you’re enjoying yourself, and then the next day you just avoid me. I thought… I thought maybe I’d crossed a line at some point without realizing. I thought I’d let you take your time until you decided to either tell me or dump me, but I liked being with you and, above all, I have a lot of patience. But then you’re whispering sweet things into my ear one night and vanish the next morning? What was I supposed to think? Himchan kept telling me you were fine, Jongup didn’t know shit, I thought something had happened to you, but no one could tell me anything! How was I not supposed to be worried?”

Daehyun took a deep breath. He already knew he was in the wrong, he knew it through and through, but it still felt like a slap in the face to hear just how much he’d hurt Youngjae when he’d tried to do the complete opposite.

“I went home,” Daehyun said after a few seconds. “I thought… This was never supposed to happen.”

“This?”

“Us. I came to Merne thinking I’d be in and out of the city within six months or so, maybe even less than that. I wasn’t supposed to get attached, not to you, nor anyone else. Then everything got a lot more complicated. I felt like the closer I got to you, the more difficult it would be the day I had to leave, for the both of us, especially since I couldn’t explain to you why I was leaving. I tried to keep my distance but… well, you know. I failed. And then I freaked out and I left before giving myself the chance to change my mind.”

Youngjae nodded silently, taking in the information. He seemed only partly convinced, but willing to listen.

“Will you ever tell me?” Youngjae asked after a minute. “That secret of yours? Otherwise I don’t think we should bother.”

“I will,” Daehyun said, and his own determination surprised him. “I just need a little bit more time.”

“Fine,” Youngjae said, walking over to one of the chest of drawers in the corner of the room. “I’ll wait until then. You know where to find me now.”

He walked up to Daehyun and handed him a small key.

“I made a duplicate when I first moved in,” he said as Daehyun seized it. “I’m not stupid, I’m not giving away my only key to Jongup and risking being locked in until he decides to come home.”

“So you knew…?”

“I had no idea Jongup would bring you here,” Youngjae sighed. “I didn’t even know you were back in Merne. But I wasn’t going to let you go without an explanation, however blurry yours is at the moment.”

Daehyun unlocked the door, leaving after whispering a quick goodbye. He felt emptied out, as if he’d been run over by several trucks at once, but he was determined.

 _What’s the worst that can happen now?_ He thought. He wasn’t entirely convinced he deserved a second chance, but Youngjae seemed willing to maybe, eventually give him one. Whether he rejected him once he found out who he was or not, he couldn’t say the other boy was in the wrong.

All he needed was a plan. He knew Youngjae would hate something theatrical – all he wanted was the truth. So, he elaborated a simple one, trying not to think too much of the possible outcome.

“You can use all of my potions and spells, I don’t have any use for them,” Himchan said when Daehyun asked him. “Just promise me you’ll get new ones the next time you go visit your family, otherwise we’re going to run out.”

“I will,” Daehyun promised. “But why do you keep so many of them if you never use them?”

“None of your business, kid.”

 

A few days later, Daehyun was handing a letter to Jongup at the end of their shift, after they were done cleaning the bar.

“For Youngjae,” he said. “Don’t open it.”

“I won’t,” Jongup said with a smile. “That’s very old school though, sending each other a letter. Are you two stuck in high school?”

Daehyun tried to hit the younger boy with the broom he was still holding but the dancer ran faster.

 

 _Meet me at midnight by the beach on Sunday_ , was all the letter said, yet Daehyun kept repeating the words over and over in his mind. This was it, he couldn’t take it back now.

“What if he thinks I’m a freak?” Daehyun kept whining to Himchan.

“He won’t,” the older mermaid replied every single time. “And if he does, I’ll make sure to personally kick his ass.”

Still, Daehyun was nervous. What if Youngjae was disgusted by him? He had every right to – mermaids were a legend, a myth, they weren’t supposed to be real. He wasn’t even supposed to speak with humans, never mind become close to them, so he’d brought it upon himself. What if he thought he was freak?

 _He has to show up first_ , he thought sadly. _It’s not guaranteed he will._

 

He’d arranged his shift so he could leave a little earlier on Sunday, yet when the day came around, he found himself finding excuses to give himself more work and take his mind off what was going to take place later. He was a bundle of nerves, stuttering in front of customers, almost dropping a plate or a glass two or three times during the day, which was unusual of him. It was Himchan who forced him to stop working, reminding him that it was time to go.

He half-heartedly removed his nametag and put his coat on, his stomach heavy with anxiety. As he walked out the door, he heard someone step out as well right behind him and turned around to see Yongguk leaning on the doorway.

“I just wanted to say a quick word,” the older man said. “I’ve been in Youngjae’s position before, and I know what you’re going through, because I know what Himchan went through too. No matter what happens tonight, we’re here for you. You’re not a freak. You can’t help who you are. You’ve made tremendous effort to adapt to our world, no one can take that away from you. I hope it all goes well for the both of you, but regardless of the outcome… It’s not your fault. You are who you are.”

“Thank you,” Daehyun whispered.

He could barely decipher the man’s traits in the obscurity, but he could have sworn Yongguk was smiling at him as he started walking towards the beach.

 

Daehyun kept nervously looking at the watch on his wrist. It was midnight sharp, and Youngjae still hadn’t shown up. The man was usually punctual, and he couldn’t help overthinking. He was staring at the ocean. If it didn’t go well, maybe he could just swim straight home. He had the potion in his hand, he could just abandon the other one on the beach and leave forever.

He shook his head absent-mindedly. It wouldn’t be fair to Himchan and Yongguk to leave without warning. He couldn’t keep running away from his problems every time – clearly, it did him no good.  

He was still looking at the waves when he heard footsteps coming nearer to him, a little muffled by the sand.

“You came,” he said. Even in the darkness, he found Youngjae more beautiful than the blue sea.

“You asked me to,” Youngjae replied, looking at his surroundings. “That’s… very theatrical of you, asking me to come here in the middle of the night.”

Daehyun grimaced.

“It won’t be for long, I promise.”

Without elaborating much further, he started taking his clothes off. Spring had come around in the time that he’d left, but the night was still cold, and he instantly felt the soft breeze coming from the sea caressing his skin, sending shivers down his whole body.

“What… are you… doing?” Youngjae said, growing more confused by the second.

“It will all make sense soon, just trust me a little longer, please.”

When he was completely naked, he reached for the blue bottle he’d left on the floor and drank it, before throwing himself into the freezing sea. His body shivered violently as it went down the water, but it quickly started to accommodate as he began to shift back into his old self. The whole process took nothing but a few minutes, but he was growing impatient, knowing the other boy was still waiting for him on the beach.

When he came out, Youngjae looked pale as a sheet.

“Daehyun, what is this?” he said, his voice panicky. “God, you disappeared for so long under there, I thought you were drowning, and you know I can’t swim I didn’t know what to d-“

He stopped as the mermaid moved his silvery tail out of the water, the scales reflecting the light of the moon. Youngjae stared at it blankly for a minute, clearly wondering whether he’d lost his mind or not.

“What… the fuck…”

The boy sat down on the sand, his legs giving in. Daehyun wanted to get closer to him and comfort him but Youngjae was too far on the sand for him to join him now that his legs were gone. Besides, he wasn’t sure he would have been much help at that precise moment when he was the cause of the boy’s astonishment.

“This… Your secret… What…” Youngjae stuttered. “You… just… ruined three years of studying…”

Daehyun laughed out loud, still uncertain whether this was a good or a bad reaction.

“Can I touch it?” Youngjae said, pointing at the mermaid’s tail.

“Oh. Sure.”

Youngjae struggled to get up, his legs still wiggling, but he managed to walk into the sea right until the water was up to his knee.

“I can’t swim, you’re gonna have to get a little bit closer.”

“Oh, right,” Daehyun said, easily swimming up to the boy.

Youngjae carefully placed his hand on his tail, softly caressing the scales as if he was touching something precious or extremely breakable. It seemed funny to Daehyun, as he knew his tail weighed easily twice the weight of Youngjae’s body, but he let the boy take his time to take it all in.

“Oh my god,” the human whispered, in awe. “It’s real.”

Daehyun nodded. He was trying not to get his hopes up, but he couldn’t help breathe a little deeper now that Youngjae hadn’t straight up rejected him, cursed at him or ran away.

“Oh my god,” Youngjae repeated. “You’re gorgeous. Not that you weren’t gorgeous before, I mean… Just… Wow…”

Daehyun laughed again, gently seizing the human’s hand that was still on his tail. This was encouraging. It was a start.

“Aren’t you cold?” Youngjae asked, looking at Daehyun’s still bare upper body.

“Not in this form, no,” the mermaid replied. “My body is made to quickly adapt to lower temperatures. It gets cold in the sea. But you know that already.”

“Oh, I see,” Youngjae nodded. “Can I kiss you?”

Daehyun couldn’t help but blush, as if they hadn’t kissed several times before.

“Of course.”

Youngjae crouched down to his level, his hand still inside Daehyun’s. It was sweeter than any other kiss they’d had before, mostly because they had both been longing for each other for a while. Daehyun knew his lips tasted of the sea, he could feel the saltiness spreading from his mouth to the other boy’s tongue, but Youngjae didn’t seem to mind. They separated abruptly, the human suddenly ending the kiss.

“But… how…” he started saying, his eyes opened wide. “Can you get your legs back?”

Daehyun laughed loudly, his voice resonating in the empty beach.

“Not interested in interspecies romance? A little sightseeing under the sea?”

“Shut up, I’m serious!”

“There are ways,” Daehyun replied, pointing to the purple bottle he’d left on the sand. “Just bring it to me.”

He drank it in one swift motion as soon as Youngjae handed it to him. A few minutes later, he felt the cold hit him violently, first in his lower limbs, then spreading into his entire body.

“That’s all it takes?” Youngjae said, instinctively putting his hand on Daehyun’s thigh, where his tail was just a few minutes earlier.

Daehyun nodded, a violent shiver making his body convulse.

“I’m cold now.”

“Oh.”

Youngjae helped him up and brought him closer to his clothes. He quickly got dressed, the materials uncomfortably sticking to his wet body. The human’s pants were also completely soaked.

“Let’s go home before any of us gets sick,” Daehyun said.

Youngjae nodded with a smile, holding out his hand for the mermaid to seize again.

 

It was late September and the busy beach was finally starting to be deserted by tourists. It was Youngjae’s third swimming lesson. The boys had found a quiet little creek at the end of the beach where no one seemed to go and the waves were calmer. Daehyun was holding his boyfriend by the waist, still trying to reassure him that he wasn’t about to drown at any moment.

“I’m here,” he said softly. “I won’t let you drown.”

Daehyun would always shift into his mermaid body before going into the water. He was a much faster swimmer in this form and he felt more comfortable. It was second nature for him to be in the water regardless of his body, but he almost felt as if human legs were an inconvenience when he was in the sea, requiring a lot more movement and effort to move than with his tail.

“It’s not fair, it’s so easy for you,” Youngjae pouted. “How did you even learn how to swim with human legs?”

“Instinct,” Daehyun replied, still holding him tightly.

“That’s unfair!”

“You’ll get there, you just need a little more practice. Trust me.”

After an hour, Youngjae asked for a break. Daehyun safely brought him back to the shore, the human sitting on a rock while the mermaid comfortably settled in between his legs. He kept his lower body under the water in case anyone would pass by and spot them.

“There’s something on your mind,” Daehyun said, spotting the familiar hint of worry in his boyfriend’s eyes.

He’d learned over the past few months that Youngjae was the kind to worry about everything, but to put on a brave face regardless and keep it all to himself. They had a lot in common on that front, although Daehyun sucked at pretending he was fine.

“Please tell me what’s bothering you,” the mermaid continued, peppering soft kisses over the boy’s tummy.

“Stop, you’re tickling me!” Youngjae laughed, pushing his face away. “It’s just… You told me about Himchan’s story, right. And I can’t help but wonder if I’m the one keeping you from your family. And I know you already went back to see them and you will again but… I don’t want to prevent you from living with your kind. I don’t want to be that hurdle in your life.”

Daehyun took both of Youngjae’s hands in his, trying to elevate his body as much as he could to look at Youngjae straight in the eyes.

“Himchan’s story isn’t my own. He made his own choices, and I made mine, and they’re similar but not quite,” Daehyun started to say. “I don’t know what’s preventing him from going back, but I know what’s making me stay. I like Merne. I like my workplace, and the people I work with. I like seeing the waves from the beach, it still feels like a dream even now. I like walking down those busy streets, I like the beach even in summer when it’s full of tourists. I like seeing the sky every day, even when it’s overcast. I like when the customers remember my name and I like remembering what their favorite drink is. I like watching films with Jongup, even if his tastes are… weird. I like Yongguk’s cocktails and Himchan’s warm drinks. I like you.”

He took a deep breath before continuing.

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” Youngjae replied easily, smiling.

“I’m right where I want to be,” the mermaid said, taking in the moment before continuing. “And now it’s time to get back to our swimming lesson, young man. No slacking.”

Youngjae rolled his eyes as he slowly slipped back into his boyfriend’s arms, shivering when he entered the water again.

“Fine,” he fake sighed dramatically. “But only because the teacher is handsome.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> if you made it all the way down to the end... thank you for reading this monster. i hope you enjoyed it.  
> feel free to leave comments and kudos ♥  
> this author needs validation for procrastinating from studying with this fic and possibly failing her exams
> 
> you can also come say hi me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/anendlessfire) if you want to!! i promise i dont bite and all that
> 
> side note: i'm planning to write a banghim side story for this (most likely shorter), hence why it's in a series. feel free to subscribe to the series (the title will most likely change in the future tho) if you're interested in reading that too in the future!! although don't expect it to come in the next few days, i need a break lmao
> 
> thank you again for reading this work ♥


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